Working in the wedding industry, you would think that I’d find planning my own wedding a piece of cake – not so! There is so much to think about, so many threads to pull together, and so much time needed!
We tied the knot in October 2022 and it truly was the most amazing day. I had so much fun, everything flowed brilliantly and virtually nothing went wrong.
So here’s some lessons I learned throughout the planning process, on the day, and afterwards!
Make sure someone has an overview of the whole day
For me, this was my mother. She was our unofficial, unpaid wedding planner. Her file of information, emails and quotes was quite extraordinary.
If you don’t have a family member who can step into the breach, your venue should provide you with a wedding coordinator who knows weddings at their place back to front.
Alternatively, you could hire a wedding planner. If you’re short of time and energy to put into your planning, then I would 100% recommend this.
Trust your suppliers
This is probably my biggest takeaway. It’s something I knew anyway but the point was driven home even more as the day went on. One of the reasons our day went so well was because we trusted our suppliers to do their job, and to do it in the way we wanted.
Keep the traditions that you want
I am a very traditional person but I didn’t want our day dictated by traditions that didn’t feel important to us. There’s quite a trend at the moment to throw away tradition altogether and if that’s for you, then go for it.
But for us, those traditions meant so much. Here’s some we kept…
My husband asked my father’s permission to marry me
The bridal party wore morning suits on the day
My father walked me down the aisle and I went first, not my bridesmaids!
We kept our speeches to just 3 – my father, my husband and his best man
Something old: My grandmother's gold charm bracelet
Something new: A pearl necklace which was a wedding present from my parents
Something borrowed: My grandmother's sweetheart pin from WWII
Something blue: My engagement ring
And some that we changed…
We didn’t have a top table in the traditional sense – instead we had a very long trestle table with people sat on both sides. It became a family table!
We didn’t have a regular wedding cake. Instead, we asked friends and family to make cakes & biscuits so that we could create a cake table, but we also ordered a cake from a local café that we love so that we could cut a cake in the traditional way.
Include the people that you want to
We both come from quite small immediate families so it was very important to us that as many of our family were included as possible. So here’s how we did it…
My mother – mother of the bride and my biggest support on the day
My father – Gave me away and made a speech – classic Father of the Bride
My brother – was an usher, my witness and our hilarious MC
My sister-in-law – gave a reading
My niece – the cutest flower girl ever
Oli’s mother – gave a reading
Oli’s brother – an usher & chief logistics officer on the day!
Oli’s sister – his witness
This way, all the most important people to us had a visible role on the day, and felt truly included in the proceedings.
Go on honeymoon straight away
We literally drove off on honeymoon less than 24 hours after we’d said “I Do”. We stayed in a gorgeous hotel, The George Hotel in Stamford, for our wedding night, so that we’d be refreshed an ready to go off on our adventure.
Planning to go off straight away meant quite a lot of logistical sorting beforehand but it really did make all the difference. Starting your marriage with a few days just the two of you is so important and gave us magical memories.
Venues - Oakham School Chapel & Half Moon Farm
Photographer - Gemma Randall Photography
Wedding Dress - Vow Bridal
Veil - Vow Bridal
Bride's Shoes - ASOS
Bride's Accessories - Own and Heidi Kjeildsen
Wedding Rings - Ernest Jones
Engagement Ring - Dawson of Stamford
Bridesmaids' Dresses - Coast
Bridesmaids' Jewellery - Accessorize
Flower Girl Outfit - John Lewis
Hair Stylist - Laura Steele at Asembo
Make-Up Artist - Make Up by LIv GS
Mother of the Bride Dress - Anna Couture Bridal
Mother of the Bride Hat - Rebecca Couture
Mother of the Groom Dress - Angela Gladwin
Groom's Suit - Paul Richman of Stamford
Ushers' Suits - A Farley
Florist - Pickleberry Flowers
Choir - Cantus
Organist - William Fox
Cars - VP Princess Cars
Stationery & Signage - Inviting Writing
Marquee - Rutland Marquees
Catering - Big Bird Catering
Tableware - Peach Events Hire Ltd
Band - The Aesthetic from DG Music
Cake - Fika Oakham
Welcome to the blog of Harriet Flather Musician!